The Bob is BACK!

Wow… its been a while since i’ve blogged. The last time  blogged was last year in August! Geezers! 

Well, not much has happened since then and I had no real reason to blog because nothing really exciting has happened since then (except for my trip home to the states). After realizing that my life has gotten pretty boring the past couple of months I thought it was time for a little change. Well not so much change more so bringing back to life.

I have been getting pretty frustrated with my hair lately and the last re-bonding i did last december didn’t go so well. My hair wasn’t strait and it got frizzy cause of all the blowdrying I had to do in the morning. So i’ve decided to chop it all off again! Yup! The A-line Bob is BACK! 

I’ve forgotten how much fun this hair cut was. I remember a lot of friends liked this hair do better than my long hair. I think the comment was “It makes you look younger!”. The guy who usually does my hair cut it just the way I like it and he texturized the hell out of the back side my head so it really looks good in the back! 

Hopefully with this small change more things around my life will change too. 

Here’s to a new year and new do! woohoo!

Denise

“Put on your scrub suit Ms. Bales and meet me in the DR in 5 minuets. Be fast because she’s already 9cm.”

… it’s my first day in the delivery room and my heart is racing, my hands wont stop shaking and all I can think about is “God, please don’t let me fuck up. God, PLEASE don’t let me drop the baby!”

I get into the room and I stop to soak in the scene. A mother sitting with her legs spread wide open with a trash can right below her, my CI Sir. Santos (who is gay btw) says to me “Ay nako Ms. Bales! Relax! Breathe!”. The doctor laughs and asks “Is this your first time?” and Sr. butts in and says “Ma’am, She’s a virgin! We are going to de-virginize her today!” … the mother laughs and I laugh and stop shaking.

“Hurry wash your hands and put on your gloves! The baby is coming out now!”

I rush to put on my gloves and I can see the babys’ head crowning! I stood next to the doctor and before I knew it, the baby came out! It’s a girl! We put her on the stomach of the mother and Sr. say’s “Now, Ms. Bales, properly execute cord cutting.” I grasped the umbilical cord and I can feel the pulsation of the arteries inside, its pretty amazing. I clamped, milked and then I cut it. The doctor then rolled up the cord around the clamp connected to the placenta and told me that we were now going to deliver the placenta.

“stick your hand in there.” she says
“im sorry ma’am, what did you say?”
“put your hand inside her…”

I stuck my hand up this ladies vagina, I felt a hard round object and I slowly pulled it out.

“Oh wow! So that’s what a placenta looks like” I said. Ma’am laughs and says “Now help me suture her up.”

As I was helping the doctor suture the mother I was taking short glances at the baby who was being cleaned off. I was so overcome with happiness. I couldn’t believe that I helped deliver that baby. I asked the mother “Ano ang kanyang pangalan?” The mom laughs because I probably said it wrong or my accent was funny but she says “Denise”. “Siya ay maganda”. When the baby was cleaned off, the suture finished, they baby was given back to the mother and I wheeled her back to her room.

This has definitely being one of the most grossest yet the most incredible thing I have ever experienced. I will never EVER forget it. By the end of the semester I will be delivering babies without the help of a doctor.

Im officially De-virginized! =)

Update!

Sorry I haven’t been blogging lately. I didn’t do much over summer break since it was only two weeks. I spent most of it sleeping. But anyway, I thought I might catch you up on some of the small things that have been going on lately.

Start of 2nd year- I’ve now started my second year of nursing school (Yay! Finally we’re getting to the good stuff). I start duty next month and my capping is on July 15. It was supposed to be June 15 but my school is retarded and didn’t prepare for it so it was postponed. I was pissed because of the last minute change! I wanted my bro to be there and now he can’t because he’s going home this Sunday =(. DAMN YOU KESTER! But on a lighter note, I’ll be in the delivery room soon! Can you believe it? I’m gonna be delivering babies!! I’m really excited but i’m also expecting the worst because my bro said that watching it is still gross and I’ve also heard awful things about the hospital (it’s not well kept because its a government funded hospital). But either way, its something you have to experience so I pray that I can get through it.

Volleyball with the Azukals- I have found my heaven! I now play volleyball with a bunch of gay men! These guys are awesome volleyball players and they are so much fun to be with. The drive to the gym may suck on some days because it is in Makati but its worth it.They are such good players that i asked my mom to bring me my gear from home because i actually need knee pads while playing. AND since I got good grades last sem. my mama is gonna buy me new volleyball shoes! woohoo! But anyway, its such a great work out and it’s also my stress reliever. I just hope that when duty starts I still have time to play.

Juggernaught Football- Yes! It’s true! The Philippines now has American Football and my bro is one of the top players in the league (*proud sister smile*). For the past month and half I’ve watched all of my brothers football games. I love it! Im always on the sidelines rooting for my bro and the rest of the juggernaughts. These guys are great athletes and always put on a good game. Their defense is so stacked I fear for the other teams because these guys are like MMA fighters! EEK! Don’t mess the the JUGGS!WOOOooOOO!

My Bro is going home =( – My bro will be leaving this Sunday and Im not sure if Im ready to let him go yet. I’ve relied on him for everything! We always eat out together, go to church together and what not. It’s gonna be weird not having him around. We’ve definitely gotten closer since I came here and it sucks that we’re gonna be separated again. The good thing is that my mom wont be alone anymore and he can send me money for shopping when he starts working… hahaha Jk Ray!… well,sorta.

Well that’s pretty much it. See, not much has been goin’ on. Just school and study. I’ll post again soon. Hopefully something more interesting.

Stop calling me FAT!!!!

Ok, I know that I’m definitely not a size 1 but who says you have to be skinny to be beautiful?!

Like many girls, I have my own insecurities about the way I look but through the years I’ve learn to accept my body. I try to stay fit because I like being athletic and strong and of course to improve my overall health. Although I enjoy going to the gym, I still have a small spare tire around my waist (what?!… i LOVE food). I guess in the philippines, if you’re not skinny you are not viewed as pretty.

All the girls in my batch are obsessed with their weight and are constantly trying ridiculous diets. Like only eating coffee and sky flakes for 2 weeks. Some of them just wont eat. To me that’s just ridiculous because food is too freakin’ awesome to give up but that is not what’s bothering me. What’s bothering me is I’ve been called FAT by almost all of the faculty in my school and I’ve been called HEAVY by people I’ve just met!

Really?!
I’ve just met you and you’re calling me FAT?!

I’m tired of hearing “Anak, you look so big, why??”. I know some people have good intentions but DAMN how skinny do you want me to be? It’s easy for my friends to say “don’t listen, just ignore them” but a person can only take so much. I was called fat again today for the Nth time by a person I barely knew and that set me off. I’ve lost some weight a being here in the philippines, its not a dramatic drop in weight but It better than what I was before.

Before

Now

….guess its not enough. I’m glad they’ve never seen me at my heaviest (pic on the left). I might have punched someone.

It’s just frustrating. Im tired of hearing it. I hate that I feel like I did when I was in high school. Criticizing and picking apart my body. I get enough torment from my family but strangers?? Geez people come on!

…Don’t even get me started on my face (acne), but that’s a whole other blog. I’ll talk about that some other time. I think you guys have suffered enough listening to my venting.

Boracay, Here I come!!! Woohoo!!

After a long and tough year in school it’s finally time to reap the benefits of living on an island. I’ll be heading out to Bora in the morning for some much needed rest and relaxation and beach fun. I’m in dire need of a tan too. Being stuck in school all day can turn a girl pretty pale. Although my body isn’t really beach ready, my mind is and Im already in relax mode.

I’m so excited! I cant wait to go parasailing, go ATV-ing, look at pretty fish and eat a lot of seafood. Along with a nice massage on the white sandy beach with my cousin. Gonna get nice and toasty too! Christine and Sid watch out! I might get darker than you! Hahahaha! joke lang…

But there is a down side to this trip. I do have summer school and I will be missing three days of class. So… when there is down time, I have to study because when I get back I have summer midterms. Yikes! I figured I wouldn’t study in Bora, I’ll study in Aklan because I’ll be going there for three days as well to visit family members I haven’t met yet. It should be interesting because they know all about me but I know nothing, not even names, about them.

I’ll post pics and a blog when I get back. And if you’re jealous, you can look at this picture and daydream that your chillin’ on the beach with me! See ya’ll in 6 days! PEACE!

Care to join me??

daydreamin’ of home

Today I got a big case of home sickness. All I wanted to do was be in my house, sleep in my bed, watch my T-vo (with pre-recorded lakers games), and just chill. I also wanted to drive my car around, shop and go to all my favorite spots (huntington beach, disneyland, L.A.) I read the L.A. times everyday to see whats going on at home and all the pictures just reminds me of what a great place L.A is. Kinda makes me think Wow, I live there… sigh.

ah... home.

And Im not implying that I live at the griffith observatory, I just like the view of L.A.

I also want to go see my nephews and niece. I miss them so much. Pictures just don’t do it for me. I need to play with them and hear them laugh.

I know I need to be here and do what I need to do, I’m not complaining, I just wish I can go home more than once a year. I’m missing out on so much.

Anyone wanna start a “Send Rose Home” fund?

Ouch! Ouch! Shit! Shit!

“Ouch! ouch! Shit! SHIT!”

…says my buddy Ben when I did my very first indradermal injection on his forearm (if your wondering what an intradermal injection is it’s a small insertion of medication into the dermis to check for allergies) But before you start thinking I will never let rose come near me with a needle! I just want to let you know that very first time I did that injection, I did it perfectly! (no matter what, intradermal injections hurt… a lot!) I made a perfect wheal (bleb) on his arm according to my Professor. And that wasn’t the only injection I performed well, I kicked ass in the subcutaneous injections and intramuscular injections! WHAT NOW?!?!! hahaha jk. I guess I had a natural knack for injections! Who woulda thunk it, right?!

Well giving an injection was easy but getting an injection really sucks especially if the person who is doing it just learned how to do it. And of course as nursing students, we have to practice on each other. So this week really sucked as my arms and butt got pricked numerous times. OUCH! SHIIIIT!!

When I got the intradermal injection for the first time, I didn’t cry like a lot of my batch mates did but I could not stop shaking out of fear! I held on to my professor for dear life as my friend Marisyl injected me! And since I was shaking so much the needle fell out and I had to be injected again. That was the worst feeling EVER! The pain radiated up my arm and passed my shoulder! URGH! Subcutaneous didn’t hurt so bad but I made the same mistake of shaking during my intramuscular injection. Again, I had to get sticked one more time. Grrr! You think i’d learn the first time right? Nope.

Here are my battle wounds…

Intradermal injection... There's two holes under that cotton ball!

Intramuscular... there's two under that cotton ball too!

Subcutaneous and Intradermal

Up next is I.V prime and insertion! I will update you guys on that one soon too! Wish me luck!

It’s that time of the year again!

Woohoo! The Lenten season is upon us my fellow catholics! Soon we will be celebrating Easter!! YAAAAYY!!!

Anyway, some people have been asking me what I was going to give up for lent. Like the procrastinator that I am, I never think about it until the day of ash Wednesday. Everyone usually gives up soda, swearing, Facebook, etc. but I hardly drink soda now and swearing is literally impossible when you’re driving in the Philippines (even if you’re just a passenger) but giving up Facebook seemed like pretty good idea.

Facebook was always a fun distraction when I’m stuck at my desk forcing myself to study. Then I realized it took up so much of my time! A few hours even! That’s so much time wasted even if I wasn’t trying to study. I could be reading a book (not a text book), working out or playing my keyboard. I haven’t touched my keyboard in days yet I can kill a few hours a day on Facebook? That’s pretty sad since music has always been my #1 love. So I’ve given up Facebook in hopes that I would form a habit of NOT using it. AND! On top of that I’ve decided to give up all computer games (Plants vs Zombie) because that too wastes so much of my time.

Later in the day I thought that giving up Facebook and games wasn’t enough, I needed a kicker of a sacrifice to make it a good Lenten season. Everyone always talks about giving up something but wouldn’t spending more time with God make it so much more fulfilling? So then I decided to pray one rosary everyday. I haven’t prayed a rosary in so long, I feel kinda bad. And at the end of each rosary I will spend time just talking to God cause I haven’t been doing much of that either. I drifted away from him a lot this year and now its time to go back. God has blessed me so much and I haven’t really shown him how grateful I am. Maybe this will help.

Good Luck! I hope everyone sticks to their Lenten promises!

This is it….

I want this…
I want this bad…
I want this so bad it hurts….
I never wanted anything this much in my life…
I dropped everything I had for this…
I left my family…
I left my friends…
I left my home.
It’s now or never.
I fucked up so many times before… I’m sure as hell not doing it again.

God be with me cause I’m terrified. I’m shaking and it won’t stop. God please give me strength. Help me to push through cause I feel like I’m not pushing hard enough.

He cheated on me… with GOD!

I know its a hard pill to swallow if your significant other is cheating on you but what if that person cheated on you with God??

A friend of mine just lost her boyfriend of 2 years because he decided to join the priesthood. “It was bittersweet” she says. She being a devote Christian. “I can’t compete with God”. I didn’t know what to tell her. She as trying to keep a straight face but I knew she was brokenhearted.

Afterward, I brightened up her day by surprising her with a Christmas gift… the return of my brother from the US (he popped out from behind the front door, she screamed and punches him in the face on accident. It was pretty funny!) I was glad that my bro and I were there to bring some happiness to her day but I couldn’t stop thinking about her situation. What if this happened to you? It’s hard to feel happy and sad at the same time. It really is bittersweet.

Would this mean that you’re a shoe in for heaven because you gave up the love of your life to God??? That’s one huge sacrifice! hmmm…..